Something of a treat for you this week - and few of those in attendance will ever forget the power and quality of what they saw.
Back in July 2003, Michael Phelps was breaking a pathetic 2 world records at the World Swimming Championships in Barcelona. Liverpool were paying a mere £5m to Leeds for Harry Kewell and the word 'dossier' became part of day-to-day language for the first time since 1823.
UCLES took the field on that July evening as Lawrence, Linsdell, Siyambalapitiya, Monk, Thighe, Briggs, Braithwaite, Wilson, Ashton, Streather and Danson.
Monday 29 September 2008
Friday 26 September 2008
UCLES v Metallurgy (24/07/03)
Thursday night, amidst the vast open spaces of Kings and Selwyn, UCLES beat Metallurgy by 31 runs to secure a second victory in a heady and magical 24 hours. The triumph, watched by President Murray and senior pro Ladds, was dominated by one of the greatest individual innings in UCLES cricket history.
Lawrence won the toss and elected to have first use of a wicket that hid it's secrets well beneath patches of wheat and small communities of grass. Linsdell and Lawrence opened the UCLES innings against an attack spearheaded by a young man bowling with run-up long enough to be the landing strip for a 747.
The pair coped admirably with the speed merchant, picking up runs elegantly between wicket-keeper and slips and bruises between knee and hip . Lawrence eventually became his only victim, trapped lbw for 13.
The skipper's departure brought Monk to the crease and having survived a torrid spell of bowling from the man who began his run-up in a different postcode, UCLES' lead batsman began to find his rhythm.
Linsdell's dismissal for 30 brought Siyambalapitiya to the crease and the all-rounder played the perfect straight-man to Monk's sharp batting wit. In the space of 45 frantic minutes, Monk introduced the hapless ball to new and exciting areas of Cambridge with a succession of smooth and masterful blows.
Cutting, pulling, driving and occasionally edging the ball with uncompromising power, the UCLES No.3 reached three figures in the final over, ultimately ending the innings unbeaten on 110, having struck 5 sixes and 14 fours from a paltry 56 deliveries. Siyambalapitiya's not insignificant contribution had seen him through to an unbeaten 23 out of a massive total of 188-2.
If UCLES thought that the game was over as a contest, they were quickly brought down to earth by a Metallurgy opening pair that took on Danson and Wilson to reach 30 before the end of the 3rd over. Danson wrestled back some much-needed control before Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite began drying up runs like an expensive kitchen towel. Braithwaite finally reduced the pressure by supplying the weary Monk with a catch at mid-wicket before Siyambalapitiya produced one of the deliveries of the season to bowl the other Metallurgy opener who had raced to 50.
Though run-scoring remained heavy, UCLES continued to take wickets, thus making the run chase less and less realistic. Eventually Wilson returned off ten paces to join the impressive Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite at the wicket-taking party and remove any lingering doubts. At the end of Thighe's match-closing over, Metallurgy had fallen 31 runs short at 157-9.
Another solid all-round performance from UCLES with notable contributions from Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite with the ball and Siyambalapitiya with the bat. The game will however be long remembered for Monk's 56-ball annihilation - the stuff of legends.
Lawrence won the toss and elected to have first use of a wicket that hid it's secrets well beneath patches of wheat and small communities of grass. Linsdell and Lawrence opened the UCLES innings against an attack spearheaded by a young man bowling with run-up long enough to be the landing strip for a 747.
The pair coped admirably with the speed merchant, picking up runs elegantly between wicket-keeper and slips and bruises between knee and hip . Lawrence eventually became his only victim, trapped lbw for 13.
The skipper's departure brought Monk to the crease and having survived a torrid spell of bowling from the man who began his run-up in a different postcode, UCLES' lead batsman began to find his rhythm.
Linsdell's dismissal for 30 brought Siyambalapitiya to the crease and the all-rounder played the perfect straight-man to Monk's sharp batting wit. In the space of 45 frantic minutes, Monk introduced the hapless ball to new and exciting areas of Cambridge with a succession of smooth and masterful blows.
Cutting, pulling, driving and occasionally edging the ball with uncompromising power, the UCLES No.3 reached three figures in the final over, ultimately ending the innings unbeaten on 110, having struck 5 sixes and 14 fours from a paltry 56 deliveries. Siyambalapitiya's not insignificant contribution had seen him through to an unbeaten 23 out of a massive total of 188-2.
If UCLES thought that the game was over as a contest, they were quickly brought down to earth by a Metallurgy opening pair that took on Danson and Wilson to reach 30 before the end of the 3rd over. Danson wrestled back some much-needed control before Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite began drying up runs like an expensive kitchen towel. Braithwaite finally reduced the pressure by supplying the weary Monk with a catch at mid-wicket before Siyambalapitiya produced one of the deliveries of the season to bowl the other Metallurgy opener who had raced to 50.
Though run-scoring remained heavy, UCLES continued to take wickets, thus making the run chase less and less realistic. Eventually Wilson returned off ten paces to join the impressive Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite at the wicket-taking party and remove any lingering doubts. At the end of Thighe's match-closing over, Metallurgy had fallen 31 runs short at 157-9.
Another solid all-round performance from UCLES with notable contributions from Siyambalapitiya and Braithwaite with the ball and Siyambalapitiya with the bat. The game will however be long remembered for Monk's 56-ball annihilation - the stuff of legends.
Friday 19 September 2008
Corridor of uncertainty
And so the merry-go-round of self-indulgence throws us off next in July 2004.
A 17-year-old called Maria Sharapova was winning her first Wimbledon, Greece were embarrassing the millionaires in Euro 2004 and some bloke called Barack Obama was making his first keynote speech at the Democratic National Convention.
Oh, and at Lords, Robert Key was about to make a double-hundred and announce himself as, ehm...anyway...
At St Catz, UCLES were Skipper James, Monk, Lawrence, Linsdell, Bean, Visage, Dagless, Wylie, Danson, Siyambalapitiya and West.
A 17-year-old called Maria Sharapova was winning her first Wimbledon, Greece were embarrassing the millionaires in Euro 2004 and some bloke called Barack Obama was making his first keynote speech at the Democratic National Convention.
Oh, and at Lords, Robert Key was about to make a double-hundred and announce himself as, ehm...anyway...
At St Catz, UCLES were Skipper James, Monk, Lawrence, Linsdell, Bean, Visage, Dagless, Wylie, Danson, Siyambalapitiya and West.
UCLES v Chemical Engineering (20/07/04)
After a disappointing brace of defeats, UCLES bounced back in style last night with a comfortable 57 run victory against Chemical Engineering.
The original attempt to beat Chemical Engineering had been stymied earlier in the season by a relentless rain shower and UCLES were keen to finish to job this time. Batting first for only the second time this season beneath a sky that threatened moist wonderment, Linsdell and Lawrence made a typically steady if unadventurous start. Chemical Engineering were assisted in their early prudence by some bowler-friendly umpiring from Bean who found giving leg side wides surprisingly challenging. In Jerry's defence, he's a lovely man.
Slowly but surely the opening pair began to unearth runs until, with a partnership of 50 on the horizon, Linsdell was undone by a devilish straight ball bowled by a young man resplendent in Wrangler's very finest cricketing attire - more C&A than MCC. Obviously it would have been much better had he been playing against Sanger then I could have made some lame jeans/genes observation. Life is such a tapestry of disappointments.
Linsdell's now traditional got-in-but-never-really-looked-like-making-a-big-score departure brought Monk to the crease and it was only a matter of seconds before UCLES' leading run scorer began peppering the greying skyline with fizzing spheres of scolding red leather. With Lawrence also displaying decent form, the home side looked well-placed to batter Chemical Engineering out of the contest - until the Denim Destroyer returned to uproot the Antipodean's evening with another magical combination of slow and straight.
Wylie joined a well-set Monk and began by striking a massive blow back over the bowler's head. Unfortunately the ball gained more height than distance and a smart catch was taken five yards in front on the boundary. Wylie had spend a number of minutes before the game explaining to his colleagues about the difficulty he was experiencing with his new briefs. As yet we can not tell the extent to which the fresh undercrackers were hindering his performance.
Monk continued to keep the scoreboard flapping in growing gloom but the UCLES batsmen were struggling to stay with him - Dagless the next to fall attempting an optimistic square cut. Bean's arrival at the wicket heralded the usual display of enthusiastic scampering and diving but at the other end Monk was to fall just short of another deserved half-century - caught behind for 47. With a number of options at his disposal, Skipper James decided to send Visage in for the closing balls and it proved to be a wise decision as Golden Hurls sent both of the two deliveries he faced careering to the leg side boundary.
After a slowish start and a spluttering middle order, Monk and Lawrence has seen UCLES to an imposing 141-5 after 20 overs and confidence was high as the home side took to the field.
Danson and Siyambalapitiya began the defence in impressive style, with tidy and accurate opening overs. Danson provided the breakthrough, feeding Wylie with the opportunity to take a catch in his belly button before striking again with a ball that bounced like a fridge hitting sand. Siyambalapitiya took the opportunity to turn the screw at the other end, bowling a precious maiden.
With a rusty and dusty sky threatening another game-saving downfall for Chemical Engineering, UCLES were keen to ensure the tempo of their bowling and fielding remained high. And after a number of downright impudent singles, UCLES finally conjured the obligatory run-out, Lawrence turning a wild Skipper James throw on to the woodwork.
After a brief period of consolidation from the visitors, Skipper James threw the ball to Bean and after a swiftly dispatched loosener, the all-rounder was moved into his stride - irritating the batsmen with his nagging round the wicket line. With the UCLES fielding beginning to purr and bristle like a recently shaved tom cat and the skies above adopting a far less threatening stance, Chemical Engineering were beginning to feel the heat. Another panicky single allowed Bean to affect an ice cool run-out. At the other end Danson collected a third wicket to close with an impressive 3 for 21.
With Dagless keeping everyone informed of the required rate like a PA announcer peddling donkey rides at a country fayre, Skipper James and Bean began to display their prize-winning produce. Bean gave Lawrence both a juggling caught behind and a comfortable skier whilst Skipper James was coping admirably with a dangerously short leg side boundary. Wickets were now falling more regularly than one-legged Irish dancers and the pick saw Lawrence complete an impressive display with some sharp glovesmanship to stump the Chemical Engineering No.10 off Skipper James. With a thankfully dry evening becoming a blissfully mysterious night Skipper James unleashed an 'arm ball' (straight, no turn) to end the evenings events and see UCLES comfortably home.
Another top-notch display sees UCLES stay in with a shout for league triumph. Monk (yet again) and Lawrence starred with the bat whilst an excellent all-round bowling display was very well supported by dogged and relentless fielding. One more victory in Thursday's final league game against the beloved Judge will take UCLES to 8 league wins out of 10 and a very handy clubhouse lead.
The original attempt to beat Chemical Engineering had been stymied earlier in the season by a relentless rain shower and UCLES were keen to finish to job this time. Batting first for only the second time this season beneath a sky that threatened moist wonderment, Linsdell and Lawrence made a typically steady if unadventurous start. Chemical Engineering were assisted in their early prudence by some bowler-friendly umpiring from Bean who found giving leg side wides surprisingly challenging. In Jerry's defence, he's a lovely man.
Slowly but surely the opening pair began to unearth runs until, with a partnership of 50 on the horizon, Linsdell was undone by a devilish straight ball bowled by a young man resplendent in Wrangler's very finest cricketing attire - more C&A than MCC. Obviously it would have been much better had he been playing against Sanger then I could have made some lame jeans/genes observation. Life is such a tapestry of disappointments.
Linsdell's now traditional got-in-but-never-really-looked-like-making-a-big-score departure brought Monk to the crease and it was only a matter of seconds before UCLES' leading run scorer began peppering the greying skyline with fizzing spheres of scolding red leather. With Lawrence also displaying decent form, the home side looked well-placed to batter Chemical Engineering out of the contest - until the Denim Destroyer returned to uproot the Antipodean's evening with another magical combination of slow and straight.
Wylie joined a well-set Monk and began by striking a massive blow back over the bowler's head. Unfortunately the ball gained more height than distance and a smart catch was taken five yards in front on the boundary. Wylie had spend a number of minutes before the game explaining to his colleagues about the difficulty he was experiencing with his new briefs. As yet we can not tell the extent to which the fresh undercrackers were hindering his performance.
Monk continued to keep the scoreboard flapping in growing gloom but the UCLES batsmen were struggling to stay with him - Dagless the next to fall attempting an optimistic square cut. Bean's arrival at the wicket heralded the usual display of enthusiastic scampering and diving but at the other end Monk was to fall just short of another deserved half-century - caught behind for 47. With a number of options at his disposal, Skipper James decided to send Visage in for the closing balls and it proved to be a wise decision as Golden Hurls sent both of the two deliveries he faced careering to the leg side boundary.
After a slowish start and a spluttering middle order, Monk and Lawrence has seen UCLES to an imposing 141-5 after 20 overs and confidence was high as the home side took to the field.
Danson and Siyambalapitiya began the defence in impressive style, with tidy and accurate opening overs. Danson provided the breakthrough, feeding Wylie with the opportunity to take a catch in his belly button before striking again with a ball that bounced like a fridge hitting sand. Siyambalapitiya took the opportunity to turn the screw at the other end, bowling a precious maiden.
With a rusty and dusty sky threatening another game-saving downfall for Chemical Engineering, UCLES were keen to ensure the tempo of their bowling and fielding remained high. And after a number of downright impudent singles, UCLES finally conjured the obligatory run-out, Lawrence turning a wild Skipper James throw on to the woodwork.
After a brief period of consolidation from the visitors, Skipper James threw the ball to Bean and after a swiftly dispatched loosener, the all-rounder was moved into his stride - irritating the batsmen with his nagging round the wicket line. With the UCLES fielding beginning to purr and bristle like a recently shaved tom cat and the skies above adopting a far less threatening stance, Chemical Engineering were beginning to feel the heat. Another panicky single allowed Bean to affect an ice cool run-out. At the other end Danson collected a third wicket to close with an impressive 3 for 21.
With Dagless keeping everyone informed of the required rate like a PA announcer peddling donkey rides at a country fayre, Skipper James and Bean began to display their prize-winning produce. Bean gave Lawrence both a juggling caught behind and a comfortable skier whilst Skipper James was coping admirably with a dangerously short leg side boundary. Wickets were now falling more regularly than one-legged Irish dancers and the pick saw Lawrence complete an impressive display with some sharp glovesmanship to stump the Chemical Engineering No.10 off Skipper James. With a thankfully dry evening becoming a blissfully mysterious night Skipper James unleashed an 'arm ball' (straight, no turn) to end the evenings events and see UCLES comfortably home.
Another top-notch display sees UCLES stay in with a shout for league triumph. Monk (yet again) and Lawrence starred with the bat whilst an excellent all-round bowling display was very well supported by dogged and relentless fielding. One more victory in Thursday's final league game against the beloved Judge will take UCLES to 8 league wins out of 10 and a very handy clubhouse lead.
Friday 12 September 2008
Angled face
At the start of July 2005, London was going through yet another turbulent period in its astonishingly varied history. Before the ticker tape had settled on the Olympic party, the spectre of terrorism had returned to the capital once more and everything had changed again.
A fortnight later, as the country began to unwind a little bit, sport did what it was invented to do and provided a distraction. Lords was ready, England were ready and the greatest Ashes series of all time was about to begin.
Back beyond the boundaries of mediocrity, UCLES* took to the field against Molecular Biology as Skipper James, Linsdell, Bean, Siyambalapitiya, Costello, Monk, Visage, West, Thighe, White and Ordish.
This particular entry is dedicated to (former) Skipper Steve who got married on Saturday. I know, I couldn't believe it either but the camera doesn't lie...
UCLES* v Molecular Biology (19/07/05)
They say lightening never strikes twice in the same place. This is of course nonsense.
My Uncle Glenn was struck 4 times during the great storm of 1987 as he attempted to clear leaves out of his guttering with a metal curtain pole. It wouldn't have been so bad of course had he not been at the front of an impromptu family conga. When the police finally arrived my socially-challenged relatives were fused together like a man-sized Curlywurly.
And it was deja vu all over again last night as UCLES*, chasing Molecular Biology's 111 for 4, imploded in the middle order like an overcooked soufflé and threatened to repeat the startling disaster of last week's failure chasing just 93. Surely it wouldn't happen again.
Bowling first amidst the mighty fields of Kings and Selwyn and beneath a leaden yet impotent sky, UCLES* made a solid start with Siyambalapitiya forcing the openers to defend their stumps whilst Ordish forced them to defend their heads. Siyambalapitiya's brief spell was however brought to a swift end by one punishing over - most notably the full toss that was hit so far the ball was brought back by a seagull.
Siyambalapitiya was replaced by Costello who proceeded to bowl two successive maidens as Molecular Biology managed just one run from three overs. Ordish finished his spell having only conceded 16 runs. As so often this season, he was very difficult to handle when the radar was chirping nicely. Skipper James replaced Ordish whilst Costello struck the first blow, the dangerous looking opener trapped lbw. As Molecular Biology became increasingly aware that 4-an-over wouldn't be enough they began to take risks and UCLES* took advantage to affect two run-outs, one achieved by a typically mighty throw from the deep by Visage, whilst the other stemmed from a perhaps slightly desperate attempt to take a single to a wicket keeper standing up to the stumps.
With Bean continuing Costello's good work and Skipper James dropping the ball on a sixpence, UCLES tightened the screw in the final overs. Skipper James finally picked-up a deserved wicket with the worst ball of the day - West taking a catch after the batsmen had attempted to hit a long-hop into Addenbrookes car park. With a slight lack of ambition, both with the bat and running between the wickets, Molecular Biology's final total of 111 for 4 looked like a missed opportunity on a decent batting track, but credit must go to a second successive strong performance from UCLES* in the field.
With Skipper James nursing a nasty impact injury to his right hand sustained whilst fielding, Siyambalapitiya joined Linsdell to open the batting. The new pair started reasonably well against an unusual pace and spin combination moving past the 20-mark inside four overs. Siyambalapitiya's run-a-ball 10 was then brought to an end by a loopy full toss. Siyambalapitiya stared menacingly at the umpire before walking after he was informed that you couldn't call a no-ball against a beamer that had hit middle stump.
Linsdell's new partner didn't hang around long - Monk skying his 4th ball and falling for 2. Monk's replacement was Bean, whose previous batting performances had yielded 0 runs from 4 balls in 3 innings. With such form behind him it was perhaps surprising to see him begin so strongly with a series of lusty strokes. With the run-rate consistently above 5-an-over, Linsdell and Bean began to chase down the total, relying on some powerful hits, strong running and a fair bit of good fortune. By the 10th over the required rate had fallen below the innings rate and the pair were progressing steadily against a solid if uninspiring attack. Putting fielders under pressure at every opportunity, the UCLES* batsmen were gradually taking the game away from their hosts. When Linsdell finally fell in the 15th over, UCLES* were just a couple of dozen short of victory.
With victory well within grasp the good ship UCLES* began to take water as first Bean, then Visage and West all fell in quick succession leaving UCLES a precarious 95-6, still 17 runs short of victory. The highlight of this frantic period had doubtlessly been the sight of Monk running for Visage who was nursing a bizarre squat-thrust based injury.
This flurry of wickets brought Costello and Skipper James together at the crease (despite the latter brandishing a hand swollen like a comically inflated surgical glove) amidst an ever expanding sense of tension spreading through the side - born of course out of last week's desperate failure. "Deja vu sir? We've got lumps of it round the back"
However, with the groundsman going through pages 18-41 of the Kama Sutra with a cat so large there were Zebra bones on the outfield, the two seasoned pros took that vital bit of control and guided UCLES* home with 4 wickets and 2 overs to spare. Indeed, there was even time for the experienced pair to run three although admittedly the ball went so far from the pitch that Thora Hird would have been turning for 4 on her stair lift.
My Uncle Glenn was struck 4 times during the great storm of 1987 as he attempted to clear leaves out of his guttering with a metal curtain pole. It wouldn't have been so bad of course had he not been at the front of an impromptu family conga. When the police finally arrived my socially-challenged relatives were fused together like a man-sized Curlywurly.
And it was deja vu all over again last night as UCLES*, chasing Molecular Biology's 111 for 4, imploded in the middle order like an overcooked soufflé and threatened to repeat the startling disaster of last week's failure chasing just 93. Surely it wouldn't happen again.
Bowling first amidst the mighty fields of Kings and Selwyn and beneath a leaden yet impotent sky, UCLES* made a solid start with Siyambalapitiya forcing the openers to defend their stumps whilst Ordish forced them to defend their heads. Siyambalapitiya's brief spell was however brought to a swift end by one punishing over - most notably the full toss that was hit so far the ball was brought back by a seagull.
Siyambalapitiya was replaced by Costello who proceeded to bowl two successive maidens as Molecular Biology managed just one run from three overs. Ordish finished his spell having only conceded 16 runs. As so often this season, he was very difficult to handle when the radar was chirping nicely. Skipper James replaced Ordish whilst Costello struck the first blow, the dangerous looking opener trapped lbw. As Molecular Biology became increasingly aware that 4-an-over wouldn't be enough they began to take risks and UCLES* took advantage to affect two run-outs, one achieved by a typically mighty throw from the deep by Visage, whilst the other stemmed from a perhaps slightly desperate attempt to take a single to a wicket keeper standing up to the stumps.
With Bean continuing Costello's good work and Skipper James dropping the ball on a sixpence, UCLES tightened the screw in the final overs. Skipper James finally picked-up a deserved wicket with the worst ball of the day - West taking a catch after the batsmen had attempted to hit a long-hop into Addenbrookes car park. With a slight lack of ambition, both with the bat and running between the wickets, Molecular Biology's final total of 111 for 4 looked like a missed opportunity on a decent batting track, but credit must go to a second successive strong performance from UCLES* in the field.
With Skipper James nursing a nasty impact injury to his right hand sustained whilst fielding, Siyambalapitiya joined Linsdell to open the batting. The new pair started reasonably well against an unusual pace and spin combination moving past the 20-mark inside four overs. Siyambalapitiya's run-a-ball 10 was then brought to an end by a loopy full toss. Siyambalapitiya stared menacingly at the umpire before walking after he was informed that you couldn't call a no-ball against a beamer that had hit middle stump.
Linsdell's new partner didn't hang around long - Monk skying his 4th ball and falling for 2. Monk's replacement was Bean, whose previous batting performances had yielded 0 runs from 4 balls in 3 innings. With such form behind him it was perhaps surprising to see him begin so strongly with a series of lusty strokes. With the run-rate consistently above 5-an-over, Linsdell and Bean began to chase down the total, relying on some powerful hits, strong running and a fair bit of good fortune. By the 10th over the required rate had fallen below the innings rate and the pair were progressing steadily against a solid if uninspiring attack. Putting fielders under pressure at every opportunity, the UCLES* batsmen were gradually taking the game away from their hosts. When Linsdell finally fell in the 15th over, UCLES* were just a couple of dozen short of victory.
With victory well within grasp the good ship UCLES* began to take water as first Bean, then Visage and West all fell in quick succession leaving UCLES a precarious 95-6, still 17 runs short of victory. The highlight of this frantic period had doubtlessly been the sight of Monk running for Visage who was nursing a bizarre squat-thrust based injury.
This flurry of wickets brought Costello and Skipper James together at the crease (despite the latter brandishing a hand swollen like a comically inflated surgical glove) amidst an ever expanding sense of tension spreading through the side - born of course out of last week's desperate failure. "Deja vu sir? We've got lumps of it round the back"
However, with the groundsman going through pages 18-41 of the Kama Sutra with a cat so large there were Zebra bones on the outfield, the two seasoned pros took that vital bit of control and guided UCLES* home with 4 wickets and 2 overs to spare. Indeed, there was even time for the experienced pair to run three although admittedly the ball went so far from the pitch that Thora Hird would have been turning for 4 on her stair lift.
Monday 8 September 2008
Turning for two...
Ok, so next up we head back to July 2003 and a clash with Remnants.
These fixtures used to be annual affairs (indeed we played them twice in 2003) but the relationship has since broken down due to 'irreconcilable differences'.
The wider, global picture is one of war, war and more war - so let's not dwell. Let's enjoy instead the Minister of Justice in Finland who on the same day that UCLES played Remnants suggested that there should perhaps be legalised brothels for handicapped people. Bless Wikipedia...
At Edgbaston, the wicket was being prepared for messrs Smith and Gibbs to put on 338 for the first wicket in the 1st test. Smith did however fail embarrassingly in the second innings. Ok, so he made 85, but he was bowled by Ashley Giles.
Back in Cambridge, the UCLES side (note there was no need for an * at this stage) was Lawrence (c), Wylie, Bean, Linsdell, Siyambalapitiya, Soames, Briggs, Barber, Danson and Thighe.
Have we ever played with 11...?
These fixtures used to be annual affairs (indeed we played them twice in 2003) but the relationship has since broken down due to 'irreconcilable differences'.
The wider, global picture is one of war, war and more war - so let's not dwell. Let's enjoy instead the Minister of Justice in Finland who on the same day that UCLES played Remnants suggested that there should perhaps be legalised brothels for handicapped people. Bless Wikipedia...
At Edgbaston, the wicket was being prepared for messrs Smith and Gibbs to put on 338 for the first wicket in the 1st test. Smith did however fail embarrassingly in the second innings. Ok, so he made 85, but he was bowled by Ashley Giles.
Back in Cambridge, the UCLES side (note there was no need for an * at this stage) was Lawrence (c), Wylie, Bean, Linsdell, Siyambalapitiya, Soames, Briggs, Barber, Danson and Thighe.
Have we ever played with 11...?
Friday 5 September 2008
UCLES v Remnants (23/07/03)
Last night, the Fitzwilliam College playing fields saw the second traditional Remnants v UCLES fixture of the season. With pockets of cloud gathering ominously like groups of young men in nightclubs, the skippers agreed the use of 15 eight-ball overs - a swifter alternative to the traditional 20x six-ball efforts.
Winning the toss, The Remnants had first use of a dry wicket speckled with the occasional glimpses of green - like mold coming through on a three day-old slice of Hovis. Two Remnants players joined UCLES in the field early on, one of whom was soon replaced by the delayed Barber, resplendent in explorer beard.
Danson and Thighe produced a tidy enough opening spell, with the 'senior pro' displaying no ill-effects from the extra demands of the longer overs. Indeed, the Finance Fizzer struck in his first set of eight, Bean taking a good catch at a widish gully. Runs and wickets thereafter began to appear at a canter, with Linsdell and Danson conjuring a run-out before Danson skittled a productive if bizarrely helmeted Remnants batsman.
The impressive Bean replaced Thighe from random-goalposts end and, with the assistance of the ever-reliable Danson (down the hill, with the wind), curtailed the run-scoring. Danson was then replaced by Barber, who may wish to look away now. Struggling with a swirling wind and a leg-side boundary so short that one of the wicketkeepers' feet was beyond the rope, Barber, and indeed the pavilion roof, came under assault. Skipper Lawrence later informed Barber that he 'may have bowled him from the wrong end' - Barber's response was admirably restrained.
Siyambalapitiya restored order with an impressive set of three, whilst Linsdell bumbled an over away from the other end with the help of an umpire that appeared to have forgotten his 'wide' signal. During which, their came a moment that will live forever. The Remnants' Barber-destroying right-hander (who Linsdell had already dropped off the unfortunate Bean) flicked a leg side half-volley to deep mid-wicket where Danson produced a truly sensational catch, twisting his body like a salmon caught in carrier bag. Danson took the moment of magic in his stride, pausing slightly to re-string his truss before continuing with the game.
To disprove the one-catch-a-season theory, Danson then pouched a simple chance to give Siyambalapitiya a deserved wicket whilst Bean and Linsdell combined for the second run-out of the evening. Thighe then delivered the final over and was unfortunate to see his decent figures abused in a final onslaught by another man performing beneath a lid. As the old Chinese proverb says...beware the man with his own helmet. The final Remnants total was a gettable 133-7.
Siyambalapitiya began the chase for 134 with an elegant first-ball boundary. Briggs however was less fortunate. Backed by a run of scores that read like a thermometer in the Sahara, Briggs was awarded the traditional prize of the in-form - a first-ball duck. His absence however brought Wylie to the wicket who began dismantling the Remnants 'attack' with an economy of effort. Wylie was soon joined by Bean after Siyambalapitiya was stumped for a promising 12 and Soames had succumbed without score. And that's where the Cartoon Capers began...
Without a broom, disgruntled dog or large Jamaican woman in sight, Tom and Jerry began the pursuit of victory. Resisting the urge to chase each other around the large open field, the traditional comic foes drove the total upwards, Bean lifting two elegant sixes to the pavilion and Wylie unleashing a succession of handsome straight drives. Within a matter of minutes, the cat and mouse combo had added 88, Wylie moving past fifty with a rather bizarre wave of acknowledgement.
Winning the toss, The Remnants had first use of a dry wicket speckled with the occasional glimpses of green - like mold coming through on a three day-old slice of Hovis. Two Remnants players joined UCLES in the field early on, one of whom was soon replaced by the delayed Barber, resplendent in explorer beard.
Danson and Thighe produced a tidy enough opening spell, with the 'senior pro' displaying no ill-effects from the extra demands of the longer overs. Indeed, the Finance Fizzer struck in his first set of eight, Bean taking a good catch at a widish gully. Runs and wickets thereafter began to appear at a canter, with Linsdell and Danson conjuring a run-out before Danson skittled a productive if bizarrely helmeted Remnants batsman.
The impressive Bean replaced Thighe from random-goalposts end and, with the assistance of the ever-reliable Danson (down the hill, with the wind), curtailed the run-scoring. Danson was then replaced by Barber, who may wish to look away now. Struggling with a swirling wind and a leg-side boundary so short that one of the wicketkeepers' feet was beyond the rope, Barber, and indeed the pavilion roof, came under assault. Skipper Lawrence later informed Barber that he 'may have bowled him from the wrong end' - Barber's response was admirably restrained.
Siyambalapitiya restored order with an impressive set of three, whilst Linsdell bumbled an over away from the other end with the help of an umpire that appeared to have forgotten his 'wide' signal. During which, their came a moment that will live forever. The Remnants' Barber-destroying right-hander (who Linsdell had already dropped off the unfortunate Bean) flicked a leg side half-volley to deep mid-wicket where Danson produced a truly sensational catch, twisting his body like a salmon caught in carrier bag. Danson took the moment of magic in his stride, pausing slightly to re-string his truss before continuing with the game.
To disprove the one-catch-a-season theory, Danson then pouched a simple chance to give Siyambalapitiya a deserved wicket whilst Bean and Linsdell combined for the second run-out of the evening. Thighe then delivered the final over and was unfortunate to see his decent figures abused in a final onslaught by another man performing beneath a lid. As the old Chinese proverb says...beware the man with his own helmet. The final Remnants total was a gettable 133-7.
Siyambalapitiya began the chase for 134 with an elegant first-ball boundary. Briggs however was less fortunate. Backed by a run of scores that read like a thermometer in the Sahara, Briggs was awarded the traditional prize of the in-form - a first-ball duck. His absence however brought Wylie to the wicket who began dismantling the Remnants 'attack' with an economy of effort. Wylie was soon joined by Bean after Siyambalapitiya was stumped for a promising 12 and Soames had succumbed without score. And that's where the Cartoon Capers began...
Without a broom, disgruntled dog or large Jamaican woman in sight, Tom and Jerry began the pursuit of victory. Resisting the urge to chase each other around the large open field, the traditional comic foes drove the total upwards, Bean lifting two elegant sixes to the pavilion and Wylie unleashing a succession of handsome straight drives. Within a matter of minutes, the cat and mouse combo had added 88, Wylie moving past fifty with a rather bizarre wave of acknowledgement.
The dismissal of Wylie for an excellent 56 brought Linsdell to the wicket who helped Bean guide UCLES home, the game ending with the new man straightening some of the pavilion roof tiles loosened during Barber's over from Hell.
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