It would be very easy to blame my absence for the last fortnight on further illness (nasty bug that involved passing liquid through a typically 'solid's only' department) and indeed an ever-increasing workload. I could even argue that I have chosen to spend more time with my family.
But the truth is that I have neglected you and discarded my responsibilities like a beaver that gnaws a 1000 trees but never causes one to fall. You will be disinterested to learn therefore that I am back now and hussing once more a globule of nonsense and drivel your way.
Another clash with Chemistry and a triumphant afternoon for a Mr Dagless who formally takes a back seat this year to bring a curtain down on an UCLES career that began when the great new dawn in the USA was about to begin under a man called Clinton.
And Leeds were Champions. I'm not sure which of those is funnier...
For this 2004 fixture, UCLES were Wylie, Linsdell, Daggless, Monk, Bean, Lawrence, Visage, Siyambalapititya, Robinson, Thomson, Danson.
Friday 23 January 2009
UCLES v Chemistry (06/07/04)
A season of top performances and gutsy victories hit a new peak at Clare College sports ground last night with a highly impressive six-wicket triumph against a formidable Chemistry side.
Clare is one of my favourite places to play cricket. It also, incidentally, one of my favourite girls names. A girl called Clare used to rub my legs in English lessons at school - but that's a different story.
On an exceptionally English summer afternoon, with a salad bowl of open green sighing with contentment beneath a fluffy sky, UCLES once again took to the field first, this time inserted by the Chemistry skipper. Danson and Siyambalapitiya were handed the new ball and began brightly with a decent share of movement and accuracy. "Nice shape Danny" could be heard from Lawrence behind the stumps. I've no idea however whether this was referring to the veteran's gentle away swing or his enviably trim physique.
Despite the strong early bowling performances, it would be a run out that brought the breakthrough. Linsdell and Danson combining to remove the bails on a night where Chemistry attempted and often successfully completed a number of very optimistic singles.
The running was however not as optimistic as the other Chemistry opening batsman who had obviously been watching too much 20Twenty cricket. Playing with all the elegance of a duck caught in fishing tackle he consistently charged the omnipresent Danson to deliver a wild collection of poorly-timed thumps and drafty swipes. UCLES frustration was then only fuelled by Linsdell's low-key attempt to affect a leg-side catch.
Skipper James replaced Danson after a decent spell yet the left-armer was struggling a little for length, with Chemistry batsmen consistently working the ball to leg. Credit here should go to Visage who patrolled the mid-wicket boundary with all the tenacity of a WeightWatchers class chasing a pork pie. In one Skipper James over, Visage clocked up enough air miles for a family vacation to Madeira. Rarely had I ever seen a man so out of breath. But then at that stage, I hadn't seen Dagless bat.
With the home side moving themselves into a position of some strength, Skipper James turned to Bean to replace the unfortunately expensive Siyambalapitiya. After some early treatment, everyone's favourite policeman finally removed the bludgeoner with a good old-fashioned straight delivery. Bean then continued his good all-round form by claiming a second wicket, this time caught by Wylie at square leg, and completing a run-out off his own bowling after some over-zealous backing-up. And Bean wasn't finished - this time turning catcher to take a skier from Linsdell's first over. It was a good catch preceded by a repeated call of "Jerry's!" which caught the ears of everyone within 2 miles of Trumpington. Everyone that is apart from Robinson who continued to shout "Steve's" until milliseconds before Bean claimed the chance.
Once again Linsdell had sneaked in just in time to steal the scraps from the table - taking another three wickets as Chemistry followed the now well-established opposition pattern of systematic collapse. Robinson joined Linsdell in the wickets with a couple of pretty unplayable deliveries late on and having been 120 for 3, the home side posted a respectable but not conclusive 128 all out.
Linsdell and Lawrence began the UCLES reply and after a decent first over, Lawrence was caught-behind off an inside edge to bring Monk to the crease. Despite carrying an average of 174 on his shoulders, Monk was struggling a little with some very inconsistent bounce and pace on a pitch that was proving more mysterious to the UCLES batsmen than was perhaps necessary. With Linsdell scoring occasionally rather than consistently - perhaps guilty of trying too hard for big shots - the UCLES run chase began to stutter and when Linsdell was bowled in the 10th over, the required run rate was already over 8-an-over. When Monk went soon after things were looking bleak, but in Wylie and Dagless, UCLES had the men for the occasion.
Undaunted by the climbing run rate, the UCLES middle-order stalwarts found runs all round the wicket and Dagless, being pushed mercilessly by his younger partner, was finding as yet unseen sources of Oxygen. With the occasional boundary joining the party, most notably from the flashing blade of the talented Wylie, UCLES began to creep in contention. The run rate remained high but stable and with just five overs remaining, the deficit was taken below fifty.
Still with much to do, the pair retained their focus and composure to up the ante further and rattle the thus far composed fielding side. Finally, with Wylie breathing hard and Dagless on his third pair of lungs, the rate dipped for the first time below the run-a-ball rate. Dagless finally fell in the penultimate over, unable to make his ground chasing yet another second. But by then, the work was all but done. Bean joined Wylie at the crease with seven required from the final over and thanks to some typically exuberant scampering and some often unnecessary but highly entertaining diving, victory came within tasting distance. Wylie completed a masterful and heroic fifty and moments later Bean flicked a full toss away for the two runs required for victory. UCLES had reached 129-4, with one ball to spare.
Another sensational UCLES victory with performances of real note across the side. The fielding was unusually scruffy at times but Visage was typically tireless and the bowling probably merited better returns. The real heroes last night were however with the bat where Wylie and Dagless produced a fabulous victory from the jaws of defeat to move UCLES to within a Visage throw of the title.
Clare is one of my favourite places to play cricket. It also, incidentally, one of my favourite girls names. A girl called Clare used to rub my legs in English lessons at school - but that's a different story.
On an exceptionally English summer afternoon, with a salad bowl of open green sighing with contentment beneath a fluffy sky, UCLES once again took to the field first, this time inserted by the Chemistry skipper. Danson and Siyambalapitiya were handed the new ball and began brightly with a decent share of movement and accuracy. "Nice shape Danny" could be heard from Lawrence behind the stumps. I've no idea however whether this was referring to the veteran's gentle away swing or his enviably trim physique.
Despite the strong early bowling performances, it would be a run out that brought the breakthrough. Linsdell and Danson combining to remove the bails on a night where Chemistry attempted and often successfully completed a number of very optimistic singles.
The running was however not as optimistic as the other Chemistry opening batsman who had obviously been watching too much 20Twenty cricket. Playing with all the elegance of a duck caught in fishing tackle he consistently charged the omnipresent Danson to deliver a wild collection of poorly-timed thumps and drafty swipes. UCLES frustration was then only fuelled by Linsdell's low-key attempt to affect a leg-side catch.
Skipper James replaced Danson after a decent spell yet the left-armer was struggling a little for length, with Chemistry batsmen consistently working the ball to leg. Credit here should go to Visage who patrolled the mid-wicket boundary with all the tenacity of a WeightWatchers class chasing a pork pie. In one Skipper James over, Visage clocked up enough air miles for a family vacation to Madeira. Rarely had I ever seen a man so out of breath. But then at that stage, I hadn't seen Dagless bat.
With the home side moving themselves into a position of some strength, Skipper James turned to Bean to replace the unfortunately expensive Siyambalapitiya. After some early treatment, everyone's favourite policeman finally removed the bludgeoner with a good old-fashioned straight delivery. Bean then continued his good all-round form by claiming a second wicket, this time caught by Wylie at square leg, and completing a run-out off his own bowling after some over-zealous backing-up. And Bean wasn't finished - this time turning catcher to take a skier from Linsdell's first over. It was a good catch preceded by a repeated call of "Jerry's!" which caught the ears of everyone within 2 miles of Trumpington. Everyone that is apart from Robinson who continued to shout "Steve's" until milliseconds before Bean claimed the chance.
Once again Linsdell had sneaked in just in time to steal the scraps from the table - taking another three wickets as Chemistry followed the now well-established opposition pattern of systematic collapse. Robinson joined Linsdell in the wickets with a couple of pretty unplayable deliveries late on and having been 120 for 3, the home side posted a respectable but not conclusive 128 all out.
Linsdell and Lawrence began the UCLES reply and after a decent first over, Lawrence was caught-behind off an inside edge to bring Monk to the crease. Despite carrying an average of 174 on his shoulders, Monk was struggling a little with some very inconsistent bounce and pace on a pitch that was proving more mysterious to the UCLES batsmen than was perhaps necessary. With Linsdell scoring occasionally rather than consistently - perhaps guilty of trying too hard for big shots - the UCLES run chase began to stutter and when Linsdell was bowled in the 10th over, the required run rate was already over 8-an-over. When Monk went soon after things were looking bleak, but in Wylie and Dagless, UCLES had the men for the occasion.
Undaunted by the climbing run rate, the UCLES middle-order stalwarts found runs all round the wicket and Dagless, being pushed mercilessly by his younger partner, was finding as yet unseen sources of Oxygen. With the occasional boundary joining the party, most notably from the flashing blade of the talented Wylie, UCLES began to creep in contention. The run rate remained high but stable and with just five overs remaining, the deficit was taken below fifty.
Still with much to do, the pair retained their focus and composure to up the ante further and rattle the thus far composed fielding side. Finally, with Wylie breathing hard and Dagless on his third pair of lungs, the rate dipped for the first time below the run-a-ball rate. Dagless finally fell in the penultimate over, unable to make his ground chasing yet another second. But by then, the work was all but done. Bean joined Wylie at the crease with seven required from the final over and thanks to some typically exuberant scampering and some often unnecessary but highly entertaining diving, victory came within tasting distance. Wylie completed a masterful and heroic fifty and moments later Bean flicked a full toss away for the two runs required for victory. UCLES had reached 129-4, with one ball to spare.
Another sensational UCLES victory with performances of real note across the side. The fielding was unusually scruffy at times but Visage was typically tireless and the bowling probably merited better returns. The real heroes last night were however with the bat where Wylie and Dagless produced a fabulous victory from the jaws of defeat to move UCLES to within a Visage throw of the title.
Monday 5 January 2009
Too close to cut
And so 2009 is welcomed in against a backdrop of light snow, like a dusting of icing sugar on a festive biscuit. In the distance, through the gloom, the Ashes can be seen massing on the horizon like an anti-climax waiting to arrive.
Our trip in the time machine (the drivers look so much younger than they used to be) takes us now to May 2005 and the unlikely prospect of some sunshine. This was back at a time when Star Wars Episode III was hitting screens in the US, Liverpool were champions of Europe and Israeli soliders were painting the skies with fireworks. How time flies...
UCLES took to this fresh new field as an impressively-strong looking Linsdell, Robinson, Danson, Hall, Dagless, Siyambalapitiya, Ordish, West, Monk, Skipper James and Bean.
Our trip in the time machine (the drivers look so much younger than they used to be) takes us now to May 2005 and the unlikely prospect of some sunshine. This was back at a time when Star Wars Episode III was hitting screens in the US, Liverpool were champions of Europe and Israeli soliders were painting the skies with fireworks. How time flies...
UCLES took to this fresh new field as an impressively-strong looking Linsdell, Robinson, Danson, Hall, Dagless, Siyambalapitiya, Ordish, West, Monk, Skipper James and Bean.
UCLES* v Chemistry (12/05/05)
Early season cricketing contests are usually moist, grey and stodgy affairs played beneath ashen skies with regular breaks for rain, lashings of deep heat and extra pullovers. It was strange sight therefore to see this early May contest with Chemistry begin beneath an up-turned beaker of blueness, with only a fresh, chuckling breeze betraying the proximity of the wintriness just passed.
After a season of near total success on the chase, Skipper James granted the visitors first use of a wicket that was shadowed in green but was otherwise drier and firmer than could be expected from a pre-Whitsun track. The St Catz ground was a predictable delight, although my ageing eyes made it 20-25% bigger than August last year.
Having impressed in Nets sessions, Skipper James threw the new ball to debutants Ordish and Hall – a pairing that sounds more northern cabaret circuit than new ball attack. Ordish began down the hill, off a run-up that left Danson bristling with sepia memories and his opening contributions were highly impressive, striking the pitch hard and stinging West’s gloves. At the other end the shape of Hall was also promising and the early overs went UCLES’ way with Robinson and West conjuring a scalp, the first of many run-outs doubtless to come.
And although boundaries began to appear, mostly through edges that would have brought Ordish wickets in a test match, Hall soon opened his account, rattling willow with a full delivery. But these early successes were to be the only bright spots of a generally depressing experience in the field as the Chemistry batsmen began to strike the ball with increasing confidence and authority.
Hall was the first to suffer, with his final over yielding as many runs as the previous four, mostly back over his head into the shadows of the mighty trees, but he was hardly the only one to suffer as runs started to come freely and frequently. The bowlers cause was hardly helped however by the fielding which, despite moments of quality (Dagless producing one diving stop that would have made Indiana Jones proud) was scruffier than a miner’s knapsack. A sprinkling of chances settled on turf rather than skin as UCLES fielders lunged for catches like spinsters chasing a bride’s illusive bouquet.
When the 20th over finally came and went, Chemistry had massed an awesome 184-2, probably 40-50 above par on a decent but not helpful batting track.
Linsdell and his new opening partner Monk began the chase with shimmering new bats and more than a little gusto, Monk cutting hard to the fence in the opening over and Linsdell crashing the first four balls ball of over 2 to various corners of the mighty field. Monk’s contribution was however to be short-lived, unlucky to drag his sixth ball onto his stumps. Robinson joined Linsdell at the crease and the early impetus was retained until the latter skied a further attempt to reach the boundary and fell for a brisk 37. Wickets then began to fall with nagging irregularity, only Dagless (10) and Robinson (27) finding double figures in the middle order.
With a chill evening wind demanding an end to proceedings, Danson returned to UCLES service with the bat for the first time since using a Slazenger V600 to stun a rat in the changing rooms at Churchill in 1982. Having begun sheepishly his shoulders eventually ground loose allowing the UCLES legend to amass a creditable unbeaten 12 in what, for a long time, had been a losing cause. The curtain finally fell with four balls to go – Hall succumbing for a brisk 10 – leaving the home side 128 all out, some 56 runs short.
In truth Chemistry were worthy winners, dominating the majority of the contest, but UCLES can look with some optimism to future fixtures as fielding improves, a new bowling attack begins to gel together and a batting line-up – still managing to accumulate a respectable total in the face of defeat – grows in confidence.
After a season of near total success on the chase, Skipper James granted the visitors first use of a wicket that was shadowed in green but was otherwise drier and firmer than could be expected from a pre-Whitsun track. The St Catz ground was a predictable delight, although my ageing eyes made it 20-25% bigger than August last year.
Having impressed in Nets sessions, Skipper James threw the new ball to debutants Ordish and Hall – a pairing that sounds more northern cabaret circuit than new ball attack. Ordish began down the hill, off a run-up that left Danson bristling with sepia memories and his opening contributions were highly impressive, striking the pitch hard and stinging West’s gloves. At the other end the shape of Hall was also promising and the early overs went UCLES’ way with Robinson and West conjuring a scalp, the first of many run-outs doubtless to come.
And although boundaries began to appear, mostly through edges that would have brought Ordish wickets in a test match, Hall soon opened his account, rattling willow with a full delivery. But these early successes were to be the only bright spots of a generally depressing experience in the field as the Chemistry batsmen began to strike the ball with increasing confidence and authority.
Hall was the first to suffer, with his final over yielding as many runs as the previous four, mostly back over his head into the shadows of the mighty trees, but he was hardly the only one to suffer as runs started to come freely and frequently. The bowlers cause was hardly helped however by the fielding which, despite moments of quality (Dagless producing one diving stop that would have made Indiana Jones proud) was scruffier than a miner’s knapsack. A sprinkling of chances settled on turf rather than skin as UCLES fielders lunged for catches like spinsters chasing a bride’s illusive bouquet.
When the 20th over finally came and went, Chemistry had massed an awesome 184-2, probably 40-50 above par on a decent but not helpful batting track.
Linsdell and his new opening partner Monk began the chase with shimmering new bats and more than a little gusto, Monk cutting hard to the fence in the opening over and Linsdell crashing the first four balls ball of over 2 to various corners of the mighty field. Monk’s contribution was however to be short-lived, unlucky to drag his sixth ball onto his stumps. Robinson joined Linsdell at the crease and the early impetus was retained until the latter skied a further attempt to reach the boundary and fell for a brisk 37. Wickets then began to fall with nagging irregularity, only Dagless (10) and Robinson (27) finding double figures in the middle order.
With a chill evening wind demanding an end to proceedings, Danson returned to UCLES service with the bat for the first time since using a Slazenger V600 to stun a rat in the changing rooms at Churchill in 1982. Having begun sheepishly his shoulders eventually ground loose allowing the UCLES legend to amass a creditable unbeaten 12 in what, for a long time, had been a losing cause. The curtain finally fell with four balls to go – Hall succumbing for a brisk 10 – leaving the home side 128 all out, some 56 runs short.
In truth Chemistry were worthy winners, dominating the majority of the contest, but UCLES can look with some optimism to future fixtures as fielding improves, a new bowling attack begins to gel together and a batting line-up – still managing to accumulate a respectable total in the face of defeat – grows in confidence.
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